Then Jesus took his disciples up the mountain, and gathering them around him, he taught them saying:

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven;

Blessed are the meek;

Blessed are they that mourn;

Blessed are the merciful;

Blessed are they that thirst for justice;

Blessed are you when you suffer;

Be glad and rejoyce, for your reward is great in heaven.

Then Simon and Peter said: "Are we supposed to learn this?"

And Andrew said: "Do we have to write this down?"

And Philip said: "I don't have any paper."

And John said: "The other disciples didn't have to learn this."

And Thomas started doing his maths for the next period.

And Bartholomew said: "Do we have to hand this in?"

And James said: "Will we have a test on this?"

And Mark said: "Is that gonna be marked?"

And Matthew, leaving the mountain unauthorized, said: "May I go to the toilet?"

Then one of the Pharises who was present asked to see Jesus's lesson plan and inquired of Jesus: "Where is your anticipatory set and your objectives in the cognitive domain?"

And Jesus wept.