ListenToMyStory #4/correction
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Message de kevin posté le 14-07-2020 à 16:07:32 (S | E | F)
Good afternoon everyone!
To be honest, I don't feel inspired at all today but it’s been a week since I’ve posted my last message so I have to write something in order to keep practising. I decided to write about sustainable energies.
In my opinion, sustainable energies are a subject that we’ll seriously have to deal with within the next years. As you surely know, fossil energies won’t last for ever. Oil or gas deposits, for example, take millions of years to be formed while we’re using and consuming them only in a few centuries. Indeed, since the industrial revolution, our energy consumption has been massively increased. Despite the fact that we know that we will soon run out of fossil energies, we keep focusing on them for short-term economic reasons.
In my vision of our future, human beings would harvest the energy they need in a smarter way. R&D has already found so many ways to do it yet. We have to keep searching on how to improve the yield of those processes but many ideas are already there: converting solar energy into electricity thanks to solar panels, converting hydraulic energy into electricity thanks to hydroelectric dams, converting mechanic energy into electricity thanks to wind turbines, using photosynthetic monocellular organisms to exploit solar energy as the plant kingdom already does. These are only a few ideas among many others.
I strongly hope that one day, I’ll have enough money to invest in a house which would be independent on energy. That would allow me to tell myself that I considerably reduced my ecological footprint. What about you? Would you enjoy being independent on energy?
Here are a few points of wondering :
1. Could I replace "Despite the fact that we know that" by "Despite knowing that" ? I feel like this part of my sentence is a a bit heavy.
2. Could I replace "we keep focusing on" by "we remain focused on" ?
3. I first wanted to use the adjective clever but I felt that "in a more clever way" sounded bizarre. Would it be correct ?
4. Could I replace "among many others" by "among numerous ones" ?
5. Would there be another way to say "in a house which would be independent on energy"?
Thank you for reading me.Wish Hope to read you soon! 
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-07-2020 18:13
Gris
Message de kevin posté le 14-07-2020 à 16:07:32 (S | E | F)
Good afternoon everyone!
To be honest, I don't feel inspired at all today but it’s been a week since I’ve posted my last message so I have to write something in order to keep practising. I decided to write about sustainable energies.
In my opinion, sustainable energies are a subject that we’ll seriously have to deal with within the next years. As you surely know, fossil energies won’t last for ever. Oil or gas deposits, for example, take millions of years to be formed while we’re using and consuming them only in a few centuries. Indeed, since the industrial revolution, our energy consumption has been massively increased. Despite the fact that we know that we will soon run out of fossil energies, we keep focusing on them for short-term economic reasons.
In my vision of our future, human beings would harvest the energy they need in a smarter way. R&D has already found so many ways to do it yet. We have to keep searching on how to improve the yield of those processes but many ideas are already there: converting solar energy into electricity thanks to solar panels, converting hydraulic energy into electricity thanks to hydroelectric dams, converting mechanic energy into electricity thanks to wind turbines, using photosynthetic monocellular organisms to exploit solar energy as the plant kingdom already does. These are only a few ideas among many others.
I strongly hope that one day, I’ll have enough money to invest in a house which would be independent on energy. That would allow me to tell myself that I considerably reduced my ecological footprint. What about you? Would you enjoy being independent on energy?
Here are a few points of wondering :
1. Could I replace "Despite the fact that we know that" by "Despite knowing that" ? I feel like this part of my sentence is a a bit heavy.
2. Could I replace "we keep focusing on" by "we remain focused on" ?
3. I first wanted to use the adjective clever but I felt that "in a more clever way" sounded bizarre. Would it be correct ?
4. Could I replace "among many others" by "among numerous ones" ?
5. Would there be another way to say "in a house which would be independent on energy"?
Thank you for reading me.
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Modifié par lucile83 le 14-07-2020 18:13
Gris
Réponse : ListenToMyStory #4/correction de lucile83, postée le 16-07-2020 à 09:58:00 (S | E)
Anyone? 
Réponse : ListenToMyStory #4/correction de kevin, postée le 16-07-2020 à 10:03:35 (S | E)
Good morning Lucile !
I was about to ask this afternoon if I didn't get an answer until
Have a nice day ! :D
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Modifié par lucile83 le 16-07-2020 11:19
Gris
Réponse : ListenToMyStory #4/correction de lucile83, postée le 16-07-2020 à 11:18:43 (S | E)
Hello,
You're welcome!
Réponse : ListenToMyStory #4/correction de kevin, postée le 18-07-2020 à 17:56:14 (S | E)
Anyone ? 😥
Réponse : ListenToMyStory #4/correction de lucile83, postée le 18-07-2020 à 23:16:50 (S | E)
up anyone?Cours gratuits > Forum > Forum anglais : Questions sur l'anglais
