<< Forum anglais: Questions sur l'anglais || En bas
Ecrit d'invention type Bac
Message de hologram posté le 07-01-2009 à 16:32:08 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
Je suis Terminale L, et notre professeur nous a donné un écrit d'invention.
Serait-il possible à vous de jeter un bref coup d'œil afin de vérifier l'orthographe et les éventuelles erreurs ?
Voici le sujet, ainsi que mon texte.
Merci d'avance !
---
Why do young people want to live in a place of their own ? Discuss the advantages and drawbacks for them.
---
There’s no denying that young people want to make their own life. As soon as they can, they leave the familial house, and it is one of the multiple steps of the young adult’s life, even if it has advantages and drawbacks. Nevertheless money is the main problem for most of people.
However, it is the sign of a new beginning, which can give many ways to go. We are going to explore advantages and drawbacks for young people who want to have a place for their own.
The familial house seems the perfect place to live. But, as parents said, we can’t stay forever. So one way or another, everyone must say good bye to the friendly protection of the Mum and Dad’s house. In this place, we don’t pay taxes, most of things are free, like clothes, car, vacations, food and others. So we can save more money for fun stuff.
But it is also stressful. Sometimes, we just want to run away because we had a dispute with them. Moreover, it is a kind of jail. The young adult can’t do what he wants, just because he is still living by his parents, assimilated as a less of freedom. This can became a real problem : at the age of 18, the children is now an adult, and living with his family can be sometimes invading.
Hence the need to find a place to live with our own company. Due to the studies, it is the opportunity to get a room, and if possible, a condo. The liberty starts here : we can work in peace, eating meals still in the packing... So we can do what we want. However, choosing this way needs a strong organisation. Money is the first one. Rent or buy a condo is very expensive, and most of time this solution is not affordable for the middle-class' children. The solution is to rent a student-room. The danger is, without parental control, doing something wrong. For example, smoking, drinking or stop studying. In this case, there is no one to restrict or to tell them an interdiction.
In conclusion, having a place to live is a choice which required money as well, but a certain maturity too.
In the present generation, young adults prefer to live independently. They are more interested in living and leading an independent life. In my opinion, I am not afraid to make my own life in the near future. It is just the beginning, which makes me sometimes worry. Some of my friends have a condo. They claims that it is something very different of the usual life. For example, living in Paris for studying at Political Sciences is sweet, but expensive. I think that young adults can live independently when they reach a certain age of maturity.
Message de hologram posté le 07-01-2009 à 16:32:08 (S | E | F)
Bonjour à tous,
Je suis Terminale L, et notre professeur nous a donné un écrit d'invention.
Serait-il possible à vous de jeter un bref coup d'œil afin de vérifier l'orthographe et les éventuelles erreurs ?
Voici le sujet, ainsi que mon texte.
Merci d'avance !
---
Why do young people want to live in a place of their own ? Discuss the advantages and drawbacks for them.
---
There’s no denying that young people want to make their own life. As soon as they can, they leave the familial house, and it is one of the multiple steps of the young adult’s life, even if it has advantages and drawbacks. Nevertheless money is the main problem for most of people.
However, it is the sign of a new beginning, which can give many ways to go. We are going to explore advantages and drawbacks for young people who want to have a place for their own.
The familial house seems the perfect place to live. But, as parents said, we can’t stay forever. So one way or another, everyone must say good bye to the friendly protection of the Mum and Dad’s house. In this place, we don’t pay taxes, most of things are free, like clothes, car, vacations, food and others. So we can save more money for fun stuff.
But it is also stressful. Sometimes, we just want to run away because we had a dispute with them. Moreover, it is a kind of jail. The young adult can’t do what he wants, just because he is still living by his parents, assimilated as a less of freedom. This can became a real problem : at the age of 18, the children is now an adult, and living with his family can be sometimes invading.
Hence the need to find a place to live with our own company. Due to the studies, it is the opportunity to get a room, and if possible, a condo. The liberty starts here : we can work in peace, eating meals still in the packing... So we can do what we want. However, choosing this way needs a strong organisation. Money is the first one. Rent or buy a condo is very expensive, and most of time this solution is not affordable for the middle-class' children. The solution is to rent a student-room. The danger is, without parental control, doing something wrong. For example, smoking, drinking or stop studying. In this case, there is no one to restrict or to tell them an interdiction.
In conclusion, having a place to live is a choice which required money as well, but a certain maturity too.
In the present generation, young adults prefer to live independently. They are more interested in living and leading an independent life. In my opinion, I am not afraid to make my own life in the near future. It is just the beginning, which makes me sometimes worry. Some of my friends have a condo. They claims that it is something very different of the usual life. For example, living in Paris for studying at Political Sciences is sweet, but expensive. I think that young adults can live independently when they reach a certain age of maturity.
Réponse: Ecrit d'invention type Bac de jean31, postée le 07-01-2009 à 17:35:09 (S | E)
Bonjour et bienvenue,
There’s no denying that young people want to make their own life. As soon as they can, they leave the family house, and it is one of the multiple steps of the young adult’s life, even if it has advantages and drawbacks. Nevertheless money is the main problem for most of people.
However, it is the sign of a new beginning, which can give many ways to go. We are going to explore advantages and drawbacks for young people who want to have a place for their own.
The family house seems the perfect place to live. But, as parents said, we can’t stay forever. So one way or another, everyone must say good bye to the friendly protection of the Mum and Dad’s house. In this place, we don’t pay taxes, most of things are free, like clothes, car, vacations, food and others. So we can save more money for fun stuff.
But it is also stressful. Sometimes, we just want to run away because we've had a dispute with them. Moreover, it is a kind of jail. The young adult can’t do what he wants, just because he is still living by his parents, assimilated as a less lack of freedom. This can become a real problem : at the age of 18, the children is
Hence the need to find a place to live with our own company. Due to the studies, it is the opportunity to get a room, and if possible, a condo. The liberty starts here : we can work in peace, eating meals still in the packing... So we can do what we want. However, choosing this way needs a strong organisation. Money is the first one. Renting or buying a condo is very expensive, and most of the time this solution is not affordable for the middle-class children. The solution is to rent a student-room. The danger is, without parental control, doing something wrong. For example, smoking, drinking or stopping studying. In this case, there is no one to restrict or to tell them an interdiction.
In conclusion, having a place to live is a choice which requires money as well, but a certain maturity too.
In the present generation, young adults prefer to live independently. They are more interested in living and leading an independent life. In my opinion, I am not afraid to of make living my own life in the near future. It is just the beginning, which makes me sometimes worry. Some of my friends have a condo. They claims that it is something very different of from the usual life. For example, living in Paris for studying to study at Political Sciences Sciences Po is sweet nice but expensive. I think that young adults can live independently when they reach a certain age of maturity.
Conseil : relis-toi toujours attentivement d'un oeil férocement critique
afin d'éliminer de possibles "horreurs" dont une "magnifique", toutes balisées en rouge, et que je te laisse le soin de corriger quand elles ne l'ont pas déjà été en vert.Keep up the good work.
Merci beaucoup pour votre réponse complète et rapide. Je vais corriger tout ça.
Merci encore et bonne soirée !
